How Long is “Long Haul”

OK, it’s a mid-life moment. We have faced the death of loved ones in surprising amounts in the past year and today we mourn the death of yet another young husband and father who was taken from this earth almost inexplicably. We are relentlessly reminded:

It hurts because we love.

I don’t typically operate with a maudlin sense of “it could all end tomorrow” (though we do try to live with carpe diem spontaneity!).  But today I feel the urge to lift hearts upward because of the reminders around us.

If we are only in this life to experience relationships – which I believe is true – then today’s a good day to take a look around. Where are our “long haul relationships?” How long is “long haul” anyway?

Relationships = relate. Start with family. Go on from there and keep going.

Hug, hold, smile from your heart, cherish them for their quirks. Celebrate the differences through curiosity. Show love that feels somehow deeper to the one receiving it. Let them leave your presence sensing that you loved differently.

My favorite story.  Our kids know it well 🙂

An old man is resting on a park bench between two towns.

A traveler walks by and stops to ask him, “Excuse me, what are the people like in the next town?”

The man on the bench replies, “How did you find the people in the last town?”

The traveler says, “They were horrible! Gossipy, selfish, judgmental, inhospitable and mean.”

The old man shakes his head and says, “Alas, you will find them to be the same in the next town.”  And the traveler scuffs off grumbling harshly to himself.

Another traveler walks by in the same direction and asks the old man, “Please sir, what are the people like in the next town?”

The man on the bench replies, “How did you find the people in the last town?”

The traveler says joyfully, “They were delightful! Full of good humor, genuine kindness and so generous!”

The old man smiles and says, “Indeed, you will find them to be the same in the next town.”

 

True, we don’t always receive what we sow.  Or do we?

Perhaps not in the moment we prescribe, but over the course of our life, we develop relationships – or not – based on how we choose to spend our time, focus our priorities and impact other people.

And we only get one shot at this life. Loving others does not first require changing them and it does not even require liking them.

Have we learned to love …. day by day?