Christmas Day 2019 One Husband, one Ex-Husband, Three Millennials with a Z-er, and a Whole Bunch of Grace. “But it’s really pretty great,” I say. Many wide-eyed, sometimes horrified people react in wonder and shock as I share the story of our Christmas Day. It’s not unusual any more for my husband and my ex-husband to be sharing a [non-alcoholic] toast…
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How can a heart soar and cringe all at the same time? As a mom of a wide range of kids, I should know this sensation all too well by now. For Pete’s sake, my 21 year old recently sent a photograph of his body practically dangling over the far edge of a cliff along the Oregon coast. Rude and…
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Today’s news connection: The Huffington Post reports on what men say about their ex-wives. This oughta be good. Click. The statements are contradictory and, on the surface a bit whiny. But when we consider the deeper meaning, (which might be risky) the potential truth huddled beneath the whining is quite important. The reality is magnified and their statements are true,…
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Wow I have been a really bad blogger lately. Maybe that means I ‘m not really a blogger at all, because one cannot truly be called a blogger if one does not do the blog-things consistent with those bloggers who define good blogging. So now I have also proved that using the word blog in as many forms as possible…
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As I drifted off to sleep last night, my mind was spinning with the truth that we are charging ahead in a new year filled with new pathways and excitement …and we must choose. Every day, as always, we have to make choices about how to spend every minute when so many needs call for our attention. As we launch and…
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Psychologist Barry Schwartz in his now-classic TED talk on the paradox of choices identified a slightly twisted form of Opportunity Cost as one of the downsides to the endless choices we have (indeed, we demand) in our culture today. “The imagined alternatives induce you to regret the decision you made and the regret subtracts from the satisfaction of your choice…
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The newly appointed CEO of Lockheed Martin was able to accept her new position extra-quick because the former CEO apparently couldn’t keep his affairs in order. Literally. (Note: I’m sure that Mrs. Hewson is a better choice for CEO anyway, and Lockheed’s handling seems to be highly professional.) Colonel Petraeus has succeeded in dropping the level of conversation about his…
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This week’s lesson in Jack’s Kids-N-Action church group is about arguing. Wednesday, the magnificent youth leader rallied hundreds of kids to holler in unison, “Y’ALL STOP ARGUING!” each time he shouted “what are we gonna do?!” The crammed Castle Room at our church rattled with the chorus of shortpeople yelling, presumably, at their selves. It was adorable and loud. In…
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Today as I read Dr. Jim Samra’s book, God Told Me I see the direct application of living to listen. I hear a voice that sounds like God on my heart – even today. First, here’s the excerpt: Love is a tricky concept, easily perverted, so God anchors the definition of love in the cross of Christ. With the crucifixion…
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A new day. After several weeks of spinning activity, crazy fun and heartbreaking change, Jack and I are on our own with no activity. Perfect. Strategic Idea: a week of healthy consumption and no screens. Adventure. First: we dive into my office downstairs to explore some family history. I teach Jack to thread a 50 year old 16mm projector. (He…
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Submit. This word has been in our atmosphere a lot lately. Godly submission, idea submission, submitting to our spouse, our situation, our better self. Every day – indeed every hour – we have the choice to submit. As we navigate our busy days, we don’t stop to ponder this choice, but we are making it with each step, each reaction,…
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My husband and I had a wonderful impromptu date on Friday night. We stole away to the only Persian restaurant in town, and instead of talking about our nutty list of activities to manage over the next 48 hours, we pondered our opportunity to grow… as parents and as humans who have learned a thing or two along the way. In…
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THEORY: Parents with a healthy view of Godly sex have a better chance of teaching their kids the explosive joys of waiting for the beautiful experience of sacred lovemaking. See? I told you. Scandalous. I don’t fault my parents for their lack of capacity to teach me about sex. For heaven’s sake, it was the 60’s. Mom grew up in…
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You’ve seen a bumblebee when it bounces frantically, persistently into the window, unaware of the clear and solid obstacle between him and the luscious bouquet of wildflowers on your sun porch? The squirrels and robins watch this bumblebee and try to shout to him “it’s no use!” but he doesn’t seem to get it. He thinks he can fly through the…
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We all have ‘em. We have lots of them and they are blocking our view. They block a clear view of our parents, our business situations, our finances, our children, our miraculous spouses and ourselves. We have scales on our eyes. Important aspects of understanding and knowledge; grace and compassion, even intelligence. All distorted because we have scales. Some people have scales…
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I’ll be clear. For approximately 22.2 years I’ve been planning to write a book. (You, too?) Now in my 40-something, fabulous, post-transformation healthier place, I’m endeavoring to bring that dream to life. It’s going to be great. I quit not-one-but-two fairly big jobs. (Ok, one was bigger than the other.) And now I humbly devote myself to balancing my time…
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SUNDAY 6PM. We pull into the driveway with two over-tired kids. Riley played in this weekend’s volleyball tournament with her whole heart and she rose to a whole new level of skill. Eighth grade, right? She’s growing powerful right before our eyes. We emptied the giant vehicle “Frank” and I poured a sleeping Jack onto the couch. We love our…
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Maybe we should be committed. (hmmm… does it negate the “committed” part if we say “maybe”?) Scratch that; let’s keep going. Saturday: Today we have a two-hour drive to Riley’s weekend volleyball tournament, and we accept the opportunity to ponder yet another transformational life-moment. This week we made some key decisions. We settle into the truth that both Steve and…
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I know. I’m like that girl in the office who quit smoking and now thinks it’s her job to make every other smoker quit too. Right now. Annoying possibly, but you know she’s right. ~~~~~ It seems like every day I’m hearing about someone getting divorced. Or wants to. Maybe it’s my reticular activator running the show since I’ve been…
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He sent us away because it would feed our hearts. When I gently mentioned to Steve that I so wanted to go see Erik play basketball at his Multnomah University in Portland Oregon – and that Erik was genuinely begging to have me bring Jack and Riley too – my gallant husband embarked on a mission. Now you should know…