This wasn’t in my plan.

This wasn’t in my plan.

We aren’t ready for these phone calls, ever. She said, “I took the liberty of making you an appointment at one of the country’s top gynecological oncologists and he’s going to come in today to see you and you need to be there at 1:00. Here’s the address.” It was 12:25 and I was pulling into my client’s offices for a 1:00 meeting. My body shook and my heart raced.  She said the levels on my cancer screen went up again and my case has now become complicated. I’m a complicated case. (Some might say that’s not a new condition. I pulled over to breathe and write notes. By the time I arrived at scary-doctor’s office I was through the choked up panic, and calmed by my husband’s voice. I’m challenged to activate the Trust in God that I profess....

Read More

If we only knew

If we only knew

There isn’t a precise moment when you can see it happen. Only that he has grown. It’s not an abrupt shift, and could possibly only be observed through a time lapse filming, like the BBC’s Planet Earth footage of a flower blooming or a sunrise from space. It is as dramatic and beautiful as that, too. Truly the bloom, the explosion, is easy and amazing to see, if we can manage to see it. Sometimes we are hanging around too close to the subject, and we are too myopic or wrongly focused. But when we step back and get a proper look, we see a bigger picture. Last weekend, I was given a stunning portrait of a genuine, brilliant, honorable young man. His college basketball career was coming to an end. He would be celebrated as a graduating senior in the way he’d...

Read More

What if we are brave?

What if we are brave?

If we try to hide our children from controversial content, they may not learn to think for themselves about important issues they’ll face throughout their life. If we try to force our own views on them without demonstrating openness to always-new ways of seeing people, we might miss a chance to teach and learn the mightiest of skills ourselves. If we don’t teach them a foundation of love and truth because we’re uneducated or unsure ourselves about the deepest love and truth, we most definitely will miss the chance to escort our children across the thresholds that we ourselves already crossed. May you, together with all God’s people, grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge…Eph...

Read More

It’s all about the mysterious work of time.

It’s all about the mysterious work of time.

Time works hard. 15 years ago I heard the expression “all in God’s time,” and as a confirmed control freak, I was quite intrigued with this mystery. I was painstakingly seeking the truth of God, flip-flopping around the structures of religion and new age fads, so the notion of “God’s timing” as something beyond my control was new. I remember the concept striking an un-played chord of … relief. He’s bigger. He is real. But, alas, in those days, I continued to fuel my comfort with the belief that I was running the show. Today, after many textured and refining seasons, I am certain beyond doubt that it’s all about time.  And each season is ours to grasp and secure as a stepping-stone – no, a walking stick – to take with us into the...

Read More

Embarking on new adventures and finding our own old footprints

Embarking on new adventures and finding our own old footprints

Sometimes when we forge new paths, we find footprints we ourselves left decades earlier. Our family is moving back to Southern California from the serene and naturally beautiful Western edge of the mitten state. (Hold up your left hand.) I spent my childhood in Michigan, so I have a deep fondness for the lakes and the uniqueness of this state’s magnificent geography and sweet fun-loving people. I left LA 20 years ago when my eldest was less than 2, believing that I wanted to raise my kids in the values-orientation of the Midwest rather than the maniacal superficiality of the Hollywood State. To be true, my point of view was skewed by my own untamed lifestyle in the 80’s and 90’s, and it was impossible for me to imagine any healthy upbringing for my children...

Read More