Serving, Leading,  The Story

Breathing In… and Breathing Out

Today I commit to getting it all pulled together.  There are thousands of pages  written down.  Decades of journals, outlines, individual thoughts and attempts to write the book. 

Or is it a screenplay?  Yes, write that.  It’ll be funny and captivating and compelling and make people cry.

No, it’s fiction.  Write that. There are three books; here are the synopses.  Characters who live the life and convey the thoughts, but in a story that gets shared as summer reading and book clubs.

Wise sister said: “Dear, if it’s truth, it will be yours and you will be able to keep growing with it.”

She’s right, of course.

Let’s get it down.  I know that if God wants it, it will work.  It must be truth.

As I go back over the journals of those crazy confused times, without His guidance  — when I drove too much and too wildly – I breathe in new truths about my own past.  Look at the real words,  and the truth between the words.

I breathe out little remnant bits of pain and bitter thoughts that like to camp out in old rooms in my heart,

….. but that might not be true anymore.

Even though today I’m so healed and rejoicing in the grace, blessings, new wildness of freedom, I’m surprised to find tiny Post-it notes still left on my heart that are so easily dusted away.   Now.

I breathe out. The little ugly sentences leave my body for good.

I’m sure there are more hiding.  It’ll be fun to pull them like the weeds that hide behind blooming shrubs that I triumphantly

yank

O U T!